I received an inquiry from a good friend of mine on my thoughts with regards to a moral dilemma. The below is the dilemma itself:
"You are an emergency worker that has just been called to the scene of an accident. When you arrive you see that the car belongs to your wife. Fearing the worst you rush over to see she is trapped in her car with another man. She sees you and although barely conscious, she manages to mouth the words “I’m sorry”… You don’t understand, but her look answers you question. The man next to her is her lover with whom she’s been having an affair. You reel back in shock, devastated by what her eyes have just told you. As you step back, the wreck in front of you comes into focus. You see your wife is seriously hurt and she needs attention straight away. Even if she gets attention there’s a very high chance she’ll die. You look at the seat next to her and see her lover. He’s bleeding heavily from a wound to the neck and you need to stem the flow of blood immediately. It will only take about 5 minutes to stop, but it will mean your wife will definitely die. If you tend to your wife however, the man will bleed to death despite the fact it could have been avoided. Who would you choose to work on?"
Oooooh! Tough questions, my favourite!
So this scenario seems to be a battle between emotion and responsibility. As an emergency worker, my job is to save lives. The total number of lives saved is the ultimate goal, and with the wife being unlikely to save, the right move would be to try to save the man. Things would be simple if we weren't humans. We all have emotions. Empathy, compassion, forgiveness, anger, and love all play a roll in our decisions in everyday life. An extreme situation like this one is no exception. So many things can be running through my head at that point in time, and it's hard to think of what I would actually do in that scenario with only moments to think. It's easier for me to sit back and answer this question when I have time and a level head, but in that moment, I could be overrun with emotion.
So, in perfect honesty, if I were in that scenario, I would likely attempt to rescue my wife. The reason being that the realization of her odds of survival wouldn't come to mind fast enough and clear enough to overrule the emotional empowerment to save that who is closest to me. I know that some people might reason to save the man due to the betrayal by the wife, but in my eyes, I couldn't imagine being that mad. For me, I believe in love as an individual thing. You are not in love with someone only when they love you back. It's a tough kind of love, but it exists. My wife may have cheated on me, but it doesn't mean I don't still love her the very same if she hadn't. I would feel hurt that she didn't feel as strongly for me or that she'd risk our relationship, but I'd still love her. That emotional tie of seeing her injured would be enough to make me react not by thought and reason, but almost by instinct. It would just feel like the right thing to do at the time.
Overall, I know that looking back after I make either decision, I'd feel regret. If I tried to save the man, I'd regret letting her die on me, and question my love for her in the first place. If I tried to save her and failed, I'd regret abandoning my duties as an emergency worker and live my life in shame, and heartbroken. On the slim chance that she survived would I be happiest, but even so, have a severely wrecked marriage, and the next moral dilemma of whether I'd want her back or not. In the scenario where she lives, and we divorce, I would still feel better that someone I love lived on, even if I had to let her go. Tough call to make, with life altering repercussions.
The question was superb, and I can't thank you enough for it. If ever faced with that scenario, I now know what I'd do. Thanks again for the brilliant first question of many to come. At least I hope :)
Oooooh! Tough questions, my favourite!
So this scenario seems to be a battle between emotion and responsibility. As an emergency worker, my job is to save lives. The total number of lives saved is the ultimate goal, and with the wife being unlikely to save, the right move would be to try to save the man. Things would be simple if we weren't humans. We all have emotions. Empathy, compassion, forgiveness, anger, and love all play a roll in our decisions in everyday life. An extreme situation like this one is no exception. So many things can be running through my head at that point in time, and it's hard to think of what I would actually do in that scenario with only moments to think. It's easier for me to sit back and answer this question when I have time and a level head, but in that moment, I could be overrun with emotion.
So, in perfect honesty, if I were in that scenario, I would likely attempt to rescue my wife. The reason being that the realization of her odds of survival wouldn't come to mind fast enough and clear enough to overrule the emotional empowerment to save that who is closest to me. I know that some people might reason to save the man due to the betrayal by the wife, but in my eyes, I couldn't imagine being that mad. For me, I believe in love as an individual thing. You are not in love with someone only when they love you back. It's a tough kind of love, but it exists. My wife may have cheated on me, but it doesn't mean I don't still love her the very same if she hadn't. I would feel hurt that she didn't feel as strongly for me or that she'd risk our relationship, but I'd still love her. That emotional tie of seeing her injured would be enough to make me react not by thought and reason, but almost by instinct. It would just feel like the right thing to do at the time.
Overall, I know that looking back after I make either decision, I'd feel regret. If I tried to save the man, I'd regret letting her die on me, and question my love for her in the first place. If I tried to save her and failed, I'd regret abandoning my duties as an emergency worker and live my life in shame, and heartbroken. On the slim chance that she survived would I be happiest, but even so, have a severely wrecked marriage, and the next moral dilemma of whether I'd want her back or not. In the scenario where she lives, and we divorce, I would still feel better that someone I love lived on, even if I had to let her go. Tough call to make, with life altering repercussions.
The question was superb, and I can't thank you enough for it. If ever faced with that scenario, I now know what I'd do. Thanks again for the brilliant first question of many to come. At least I hope :)
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